So to give everyone a bit of background info, I’ve been tasked to write a wedding speech for a friend of mine who will be getting married quite soon. I’m not exactly sure why I was chosen to do so other than the fact that the bridesmaids don’t want to. Call it fear of public speaking, lack of confidence, or the inevitable pressure felt when doing it, but the bottom line is I gotta step up.

I’ve been going through my notes on the matter for the better part of a week and I’ve written, then re-written, then swore at myself a lot, tore up a bunch of drafts and realized that this is probably the most important thing I’ve ever put on paper. In comparison to video game scripts, web site copy and ad campaigns, wedding speeches can make or break you… figuratively of course. Not only am I writing to entertain, but I’ve also got to say it out loud. I have to grab the attention of the entire audience, and make it endearing enough that the bride doesn’t think I’m a big goof. Then there’s the argument of jokes, stories and what I am now referring to as the “Aaaaaawe” moments.

I’ve done quite a bit of research on the matter and I think there’s a pace you can take when writing/reading a wedding speech. You want to draw them in, keep them and take them on a ride they’ll never forget. In other words, you have to write the dialogue for a movie trailer. I’m alright when it comes to the excitement and the stories – I’ve known the bride since the first day of Kindergarden so the tales are endless. Where I’m having trouble is the “Aaaaaawe.” factor. How much “Aaaaaawe,” do I include? Do I try to make people cry? If I do, how do I know people won’t just laugh?

My solution for the moment is to tell a tale. How I met the bride, how I felt when the bride met the groom and all of the “Aaaaawe” moments in between. Similar to cutting a movie trailer, I want to include high moments and splice in “Aaaaawe,” moments. The key right now is trying not to blow the ultimate “Aaaawe” in the beginning. Timing, pace and a plan to toy with the emotions of the audience and they will be mine…. ALL MINE!!!! Muahahahahahahahahahahaha

Seriously though, I have no idea what I’m going to write about because I just looked over my last draft and decided to burn it and bury the remains in the back yard. Damn this shit is difficult…